Just Between Us Read online

  “So what did happen last night?” Mum said, turning to put a fried egg on my plate.

  “What do you mean? I was drunk, and I fell.”

  “Did you fall out with someone? I mean Kyle came running out and everyone seemed upset.”

  “No, don’t be ridiculous, Kyle probably wanted a free ride home.”

  “Hmmm,” Mum said, turning back to the hob. “I was young once, you know.” She laughed. “But you don’t have to tell me anything.”

  “There’s nothing to tell.” I sighed. We were all silent for a little while before she finished Kyle’s egg and placed it on a plate for him.

  “Okay then, I’ll go and get showered and dressed. I’ll be ready by half past,” she said

  “Okay, Mum.”

  We sat in silence and ate our eggs with toast. I watched Mum walk out of the kitchen and then turned to him.

  “What are you trying to do?” I hissed through narrowed eyes.

  “What?”

  “She is already suspicious about last night with the way you acted, and now you offer to take me to the hospital?”

  “She didn’t hear.” He took a bite of his egg on toast.

  “She heard,” I said quietly. “She hears everything.”

  He blew out a breath and turned to me. “Soph, I just want things to be like they were.”

  “Well by acting like my friend and sitting with me through breakfast, you’re not doing such a good job.”

  “What? We’ve sat together before.”

  “No,” I said firmly. “No we haven’t. Nor have we ever been friends, nor have you ever been interested in my well-being.”

  “I have.” He frowned.

  “Kyle, we’re not friends, Okay? What we were …” I emphasised the last word, “is indescribable, and now it’s over, so let’s not try and pretend it was something it wasn’t.”

  I stood to leave, and he grabbed my arm. “Soph.” He looked directly into my eyes, but the words just didn’t come, and for a fleeting second I felt sorry for him. He had fucked it up, whatever we had. It was exciting and crazy, and mind blowing, and now it was over. He was a nasty piece of work who could break my heart in an instant, and so I had to stay far, far away from him. Last night I saw the depths of his dark heart, and today he was trying to make that right.

  “Kyle, maybe one day we can be friends.” I smiled casually. “But right now you have to let me go.” I wasn’t just referring to my arm, but he dropped it immediately, my words hanging in the air. He wasn’t attached to me emotionally, but I certainly had been beginning to get attached to him. It was definitely time to stop. He could handle this sort of thing, but I really couldn’t, and if harsh words in my bedroom brought tears to my eyes after a few weeks, imagine how it could feel months down the line.

  “I can do that.” He grinned his kilowatt smile, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

  After I had my permanent cast put on I couldn’t work at my café job and with Kathryn and Ashley working that left me alone a lot during that first week. Mum and Mick were out at work, and so I just roamed around the house, unable to drive anywhere, sunbathing when it was warm enough and reading any books that I could find, including Mum’s faded Jackie Collins collection. I sat in the back garden on Thursday afternoon reading Lady Boss which was much better than I could have imagined, struggling to hold it up for long with my good hand.

  “Hi!” I heard Kyle shout from the back double French doors that led out from the conservatory. I snapped my head up. I was wearing a yellow bikini that he had seen before in Mexico, but I still felt a little exposed. My body reacted to the mere sight of him. It was a traitor; my stomach was in knots, and my heart racing.

  “Oh hi,” I said, shifting uncomfortably and grabbing for my vest top and putting it on. He started to walk towards my sun lounger.

  “So.” He nodded to the book. “Reading up on future careers.”

  “Ha ha,” I said sarcastically. “It’s actually really good.”

  “I bet.” He raised an eyebrow, sitting on the edge of the lounger. “Isn’t it like porn for mums or something?”

  I coughed, a little embarrassed. “Not quite.” I smiled.

  “Where’s your little gaggle of friends?” he asked casually.

  “Oh, they’ve got jobs, I had a job, but they don’t want a disabled waitress.” I held up my arm, and he laughed.

  “Suppose you’d be a bit rubbish carrying one plate at a time. Thought Mick said no jobs this summer, anyway, enjoy our freedom and all that.”

  “My dad,” I sighed, “he wants me to understand the value of money.”

  He nodded, “It’s nice that he cares.”

  “I suppose.” The direct sunlight meant I couldn’t see his face very well, but he seemed thoughtful.

  He broke the silence. “You bored?”

  “Well I’ve got my book but …”

  “So, yes?”

  “Yes,” I laughed, shaking my head, “but…”

  “How about we go to the cinema and stuff our faces with pizza afterwards?”

  “The cinema? But it’s so hot out, why would we want to go inside?” Then I realised his intention, get me in the cinema and all alone and try something on. He must have seen the cogs turning in my head.

  “Whoa.” He held his hands up, “Seriously no funny business, I won’t touch you, I promise. Just cinema and pizza, and I don’t care how hot it is, I’m bored.”

  “Oh.” I looked down feeling foolish, he’d obviously got over whatever attraction he had to me, and now I was seriously embarrassed, but it didn’t explain why he suddenly wanted to spend time together. “All your friends busy?” I asked, glancing up to look at him again.

  “No.” He blew out a breath in frustration. “Look forget it, Okay? I was just offering ‘cause I know you’re housebound. Forget it.” He jumped up off the lounger.

  “Wait,” I yelped in an unnatural voice that I was instantly ashamed of. He stopped and turned to me. “You’re right, I’m bored, and if the offer still stands I do really want to go.” He grinned.

  “Great.” He scanned my body as I stood up. “Are you going in those little knickers?” He raised an eyebrow to me.

  I smirked and shook my head, “No I better get changed, and they aren’t knickers, it’s a bikini.”

  He nodded and laughed. “Same thing. Come on.” He pulled me to him, his arm around my shoulders. It was such an innocent gesture, one that any boy, or even girl for that matter, might do to a friend after they had shared a joke. The problem was that when Kyle did this to me it made every nerve-ending in my body pay attention, especially those that weren’t covered very well at this precise moment.

  I ran upstairs and struggled getting changed with my one arm. Getting the bikini off was hard enough, let alone getting knickers on, and jeans were practically impossible unless I wanted to be there all night. So I decided on an easy sundress, but I wouldn’t be able to fasten it. I brushed my hair, added some make up, and then swallowed my pride and called Kyle.

  “Kyle, um, please can you help me?” I heard him bound up the stairs.

  “What is it?” he said, taking the steps two at a time and reaching my door.

  “I … um, I can’t fasten my dress, with this cast on, it’s just …”

  “No probs, turn around.” I turned, knowing exactly what he was faced with, heart shaped buttons that would fasten over the pale pink bra I wore. He brushed my hair out of the way over my shoulder, and as he did, his fingertips grazed my shoulder, my breath caught, and I hoped he didn’t notice. He started slowly at the bottom, perhaps struggling a little with the tiny buttons in his big hands. Eventually they were all done up, and my pulse was racing, feeling his breath on the back of my head, and smelling him so close. He placed his hands on my shoulders and patted.

  “All done,” he said, I spun around to face him and almost toppled over as I came face to face with him. He put his hands out to steady me and grabbed both my arms.

 
; “Careful,” he said, his eyes blazing into mine. “You are so clumsy, you’ll break that other arm if you’re not careful.” I laughed lightly, and we stood looking at each other in silence. “Come on.” He broke the spell. “Let’s go, I want to be early and get popcorn.”

  “Okay.” I nodded, following him down the stairs. I texted my mum and told her that I was going out but didn’t mention Kyle, as I didn’t want to make her suspicious, and she noticed everything. Of course she would know when we got home, but I could deal with it then.

  We drove to the cinema in Blackpool and had decided on a comedy that wasn’t too girly or full of boyish gore, a happy medium. It was definitely a very different situation. Kyle was talking to me about David and some stupid thing he had done recently, driving after a few drinks and being pulled over by the police. He also mentioned Vinnie and some party they were going to. I mostly looked out of the window and laughed in the right places. This Kyle was quite different to the boy who had me begging for more from just one touch, or the surly teenager that I had lived with these past few years. I accepted it gladly, but wondered exactly what it meant. I was getting the Kyle Hanson experience usually reserved for his elite group of school friends, and I wasn’t sure what I had done to deserve it.

  When we arrived Kyle tried to help me out of the car like I was an invalid.

  “I can do doors.” I laughed as he slammed it after me.

  “Okay, I’ll remember that.”

  Kyle bought the tickets and then I got the popcorn and drinks. It didn’t matter who bought … either way it was Mick’s money.

  We were the only two in the small cinema, and Kyle burst out laughing when we entered. “Wow, private show.” He grinned.

  I nodded, sitting warily. “Not many people come to the cinema mid-afternoon in the summer,” I said.

  “You’re telling me.” We sat for a while waiting for the film to come on, and I checked my phone for messages.

  “So do you think we can be friends?” Kyle asked, looking to me.

  I smiled at him. “Is that what this is all about?”

  “What?” he said.

  “Bringing me out? Being nice and normal, you want to be friends?”

  He shook his head. “No, I mean, I just wanted us to do something together, something normal, and you were at home, and so was I so …”

  “Well it’s nice.” I took a sip of my drink. “Thanks.”

  “I am normal you know, not just a sex pest.”

  I laughed. “You can be a bit of a brat around the house, though.”

  “It’s my dad … he brings the worst out in me.”

  “Yeah we all saw that on ball night,” I said, eyes wide and a smirk on my face.

  “I was crazy that night, Okay? Just forget about that. That wasn’t me, this is me.”

  “If you say so.” I took a handful of popcorn and the lights went down for the film to start, just as Kyle moved in to whisper in my ear.

  “If friends is all I get then I can handle that.” He fell back to his seat and I looked over to his serious face and swallowed hard. I wanted friends to be all he was going to get but looking at him there I wasn’t sure that it would ever be enough. If he was going to keep up the nice guy routine then that might make things even harder. I hoped today was about forgetting what we had done and moving forward, but perhaps it was far from that.

  We stopped on the way home for pizza and Mum texted to say that she and Mick were going out for dinner with some friends. Kyle smiled when I told him, and I wondered if it was because we would be alone or that he hadn’t received a text informing him of where they would be. We got home around seven, and I sighed as we got inside.

  “Well thanks for a great day.” I grinned.

  “You’re welcome.”

  “Well, I’ll go and get out of this dress and get some comfies on.”

  “You need help?” Kyle asked, an eyebrow raised.

  “Erm …” I stuttered, feeling flush.

  “No funny business, I’ll just do the buttons. I won’t try anything, I promise.”

  I nodded. “Oh, Okay then. Are you out tonight?”

  “No,” he said, following me upstairs, “We can have a beer in the garden if you want?”

  “Oh Okay.”

  He put his hands on my shoulders following me up the stairs. “Soph?”

  “Yep.”

  “I don’t wanna get mushy or anything right? But the other night that wasn’t me, it was a crazy, jealous idiot who had no business being such a dick head. I’m not a fucking saint, but I want to make it right. Okay?”

  “Okay.” I breathed.

  “I’m not expecting you to forget or whatever, but I want you to know that I still want you. I’ll always want you, but if we can’t do that then I want us to be friends.”

  We reached the top of the stairs, but I didn’t turn to look at him, my stomach was full of butterflies, and I wasn’t sure what to say. If he was asking me if I wanted him, then the answer would always be yes, but if I had to choose then it had to be a no. He may seem nice right now, and he was heartbreakingly good looking, but a secret relationship with my step-brother could only lead to heart ache. It was better to not let anything happen again.

  I turned into him. “I believe you’re sorry.” I sighed, looking up into his eyes, “But me and you … that’s still a bad idea.”

  “I know,” he said quietly, his eyes bored into mine and almost took my breath away. “The thing is Soph, you’re all I think about and I … I hate the way I fucked it up.”

  “It had to end one day.” I shrugged, “I appreciate you trying to make it up to me, but you should see your friends, don’t take me places because you feel guilty. Seriously, no hard feelings.”

  He placed his hands on the tops of my arms and moved closer to me, “I’m not doing this because I feel guilty, Soph, I’m doing this because I miss you … fuck Dave and Vinnie, Jesus. I miss you.”

  I smiled shyly and broke my eyes away from him. I shook my head.

  “What?” he whispered.

  “This is so dangerous, Kyle, sex is one thing but when we have feelings …”

  “You have feelings?” I looked up to him, anxious that he now thought I had feelings. Shit, I was letting my guard down, and I needed it desperately to protect me.

  “I mean …” I began.

  “I like you, Soph, it’s more than sex, Okay? I like you, you’re funny, crazy sexy, and I like just being together like this. Why can’t we do that?”

  “Because Kyle, if I let myself like you and fall for you then where does that leave me in September. Heartbroken at university?”

  “We’re not related, we could …”

  “No,” I cut him off, “It’s weird, it’s too weird, everyone would think it was creepy. No one can know,” I snapped.

  “Fine.” He took his hands off me and held them up. I saw anger in his eyes again, but this time he didn’t shout. “Friends it is.” He smiled thinly.

  I was so confused. I was relieved in one way, and disappointed in another. I wanted to decide and for it to be over, to not have to hide or sneak around anymore, but I also wanted him to fight for me. He had admitted that he felt something, that what we did had meant a little more to him than just sex, and I wanted him to show me. Deep inside I was relishing just how amazing he had made me feel, and here I was wishing he would kiss me. I wanted him to make me realise how much he wanted me but instead he was doing exactly as I asked, staying away.

  “Come on, let’s get your buttons undone.” He turned me and pushed me forwards.

  Fourteen – Just stunning

  Now

  The day at work with Kyle seemed to fly by. Geraldine wasn’t much of a conversationalist, but she managed to talk at me about her job and different clients to keep me entertained until lunch. There were also plenty of magazines in the office to leaf through, and the coffee machine hurled out a decent cup every so often. Just after twelve Kyle came out of his office into Geraldine
’s open plan area.

  “Ladies.” He grinned. Geraldine didn’t look up, but I snapped my head up, perhaps a little too eager to get out of there. “Shall we go grab some lunch?” he grinned, “I’m meeting Matt at twelve-thirty.”

  “Where are you taking him? You two look pretty casual.” She cast an appraising glance over us.

  “Just a pub, I don’t have to wine and dine him, he’s already a client.”

  “Okay.” She nodded. Kyle shook his head. There was definitely a story there as she acted more like his boss than the other way around.

  “Come on Soph.” We made our way outside.

  “She’s pretty bossy.” I laughed.

  “I know, but she’s trustworthy, and I’ve known her a long time.”

  “Ex-girlfriend?” I asked, my eyebrows raised.

  “Jealous?” He grinned. I smiled at him and shook my head. “No,” He said as we climbed in the car, “just someone who I’ve known a long time and who knows me, not how much I’ve got in the bank.”

  I nodded, “So how much is that exactly?” I teased.

  He turned to me. “Enough to keep me happy.”

  “Wow, that much?” I teased with a grin.

  We drove to a nearby high street where we met Matt at a high-end pub full of sports memorabilia. We all ordered burgers and spent most of our lunch talking about all sorts, and it mostly revolved around Matt, I chatted easily. He was uber-trendy, wore a cap throughout the entire meal, and had some serious designer stubble. He told me what type of music he made and told me some songs he’d written for bands that I had heard of. He was easy to talk to and seemed to enjoy my wide-eyed interest. At one point Kyle sat back in his chair and watched on amused as I chattered easily with Matt. After an hour and a half, they organised some studio time, and Kyle paid the bill.

  “Nice to meet you,” Matt said with a grin as he hugged me goodbye. “If we had girls like you in my home town I’d never have left home.”

  I laughed and looked to Kyle who seemed amused. “Hands off Matt, see you in a couple of weeks.”

  “See ya, mate.” Matt shook Kyle’s hand and pulled him into a man hug.